


Toymaker's Tinkering

by PaintSplattere



Category: Homestuck
Genre: F/M, Femdom, For Science!, Fucking Machines, Inappropriate use of Space powers, Jade Harley Has a Dog Penis, Trans Male Character
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-08-07
Updated: 2020-08-07
Packaged: 2021-03-06 04:27:23
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,398
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/25757341
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/PaintSplattere/pseuds/PaintSplattere
Summary: Working on getting all the kinks out of their data, Jade and Dirk work on stress testing a fun new toy. After all, how can they build Hal a better body without knowing all the limits of Dirk's body?
Relationships: Auto-Responder | Lil Hal/Dirk Strider, Auto-Responder | Lil Hal/Jade Harley, Auto-Responder | Lil Hal/Jade Harley/Dirk Strider, Jade Harley/Dirk Strider
Comments: 3
Kudos: 29
Collections: Drone Season 2020





	Toymaker's Tinkering

**Author's Note:**

  * For [forkidcest](https://archiveofourown.org/users/forkidcest/gifts).



“What do you think, Hal? Good so far, or do you think it could be faster?” Jade asked, looking over her notes as the android hummed softly. It was hard to hear over the slick, wet slapping of silicone meeting flesh, and the whirring of a hard-working motor. 

“I think a touch faster… maybe… add a decrease of five seconds per rotation?” He commented as he leaned over their ever-willing guinea pig.”What do you think, Dirk?” 

His response was as laced with moans as it was sarcasm, “Mnn, nah, too slow. Crank it up even higher. I-Incre-ease the output for-force!” his breath caught as the soft silicone spines on the dildo raked over something sensitive within him. “Oh fuck… Who chose this attachment again?” he asks, breathless. Hal can’t keep the smirk off his face as he watches Dirk writhe. 

“Asshhhhole!” Dirk snaps at him, without any meaningful heat to it. He can’t keep the groans within as the machine whirs up to full speed with a soft whine of its motor. His mind can’t help but stray faintly as he considers how best to improve its performance, the thing isn’t exactly new and it’s been in a few of their prototypes. His thoughts are firmly driven from his head as the machine pushes even harder within him and his head snaps up to look at the control panel.

Jade simply smiles innocently at him, as if her fingers aren’t faux-carelessly finding new settings on the panel. “Careful what you ask for Dirk,” she replies smartly as she fiddles with the knobs of the fucking machine, increasing its output even more. One in a line of them in the workshop, and freshly made too. The welds had finally cooled not an hour before. Jade and Hal had lost the rock-paper-scissors match to test the mechanical marvel, but they were having just as much fun watching the beads of sweat form on alabaster skin. 

Beads that were turning into soft drips as the machine kicked up in speed and power, the motor’s hum turning into an aggressive growl as Dirk threw his head back, his usually pristine hair a mess as the pleasure rose. Jade smiled down at him, sitting on a nearby swivel chair, “Now then, let’s see if we can’t test those limits.” she says, crossing her legs and resisting the urge to tend to the rising heat under her skirt. 

Hal moves closer to her, teasingly running his hands down her sides from behind as she watches Dirk shudder at the newest thrusts. She leans up, kissing him softly as his thumbs find the hem of her skirt and yank downwards. Jade laughs at his boldness, wriggling a bit to help him take the thing off. Testing things always did get her excited, her body charged with heat as Hal’s hands trace over her hip bones and move ever downward, feeling out her body as if it’s the first time all over.

She sighs a happy noise through her nose as his left hand wraps firmly yet gently around her cock, moving up and down in just the right way that has that happy sigh turning into a guttural moan. Hal laughs, kissing her neck as he watches the play of emotions over her face. “Can’t say you don’t like this thing a little, even if it does get in the way sometimes.” he coos. Jade shakes her head, “Nope. Sorry, Hal, I wasn’t exactly looking for this thing when I hit god-tier.” Her reply is sharp and firm and he backs off, moving his right hand down further to find her clit, stimulating it with his thumb as his fingers spread the folds that hide it open.

Jade almost forgets about the test as his hand drives up deep into her, sharp and fast but oh so perfect. “Fu-UHCK! Hal, more wa-warning… damn, that’s good.” she admonishes, as he pumps two fingers then three into her. “Oh, where’s the fun in that?” Hal teasingly replies, working his fingers in and careful to not pinch anything with his finger joints. Not for the first time, he can’t help but want that upgrade now, if only to FEEL more than just heat as he jumps in his arms when he finally finds her g-spot. He’s relentless as he rubs firmly at it, moving the heel of his hand to grind against her clit. His left hand isn’t still, running up and down her cock, teasing under the head of it. “H-Hal! C-Close... nnAH!” She squeals, panting hard as cum jets from her cock at the same time his fingers grow slick and wet. 

When her mind comes back down, she looks over at Dirk, “Mn… you okay over there, Dirk?” she asks. She feels a bit bad for having forgotten about him momentarily. A smile is lazily spread over her face, watching him shake against the frame. She would feel worse, if she didn’t know watching her with Hal tended to rile him up just as much.

“H-Harder! I’ve taken more in my sleep.” Dirk challenges, leaning back into the device and shuddering almost imperceptibly at the shift in angle. Jade’s eyes still caught the motion, the scientist in her reveling at the challenge. Hal smirks over Dirk’s back, “Maybe he needs something bigger, size queen.” he teases. Dirk’s eyes go fractionally wider behind his shades as Jade’s fingers crackle with dancing green lightning. “You’re right, Hal. I don’t think we could upgrade your body to perfect specifications if we don’t get all the right data,” she replies as she slowly moves to open her fingers from her seat. 

Dirk chokes on air as the dildo inside him grows with the motion, pressing perfectly against all the tender spots inside of him as it moves. He bites his lip to stifle the moans but fails as a particularly soft nub grinds against his g-spot. Stars erupt in his vision as he shakes, letting himself fall forward more on his elbows. He gasps, hearing the motor whining angrily as the power increases and shoves the dildo harder and harder into him. The slick sensation of an unrelenting force crashing into him leaves him feeling weak as a kitten. “How’s it feel, Dirk?” Hal asks in his ear, his metallic fingers running down his spine and leaving slick trails of Jade’s juices in their wake. 

“Mnnn, fuuuuck that’s goo-good… the angle is per--PERFECT!” he cries out, orgasm catching him off guard, his vaginal passage clamping hard against the tool. Hal smirks, “Good to know… by my calculations, you achieved orgasm in less time than usual.” Jade makes a note of that on her clipboard as she powers the machine down. “Wha? Noo… don’t turn it off yet…” Dirk whines, going pleasantly limp as it slows down and stops.

Jade shushes him softly, rotating the machine by hand to help slide the dildo out of the limp engineer. “The motor needs finer tuning, I think. It was whining a little at the end there and I don’t want to push it more than it can handle. Besides… you remember the LAST time one of these babies malfunctioned?” Jade replies soothingly as she gently ruffles his hair. He groans as he sits up, arms trembling just a touch as Hal assists him with a firm metal arm to help support him.

Jade gently wipes away the sweat and mess with a cool, damp cloth as Hal holds him up, “There we go, a touch more refreshing than just letting that stuff stay on you. How’d you rate this version?” she asks, as he straightens up. Dirk considers, gently humming as Hal takes the cloth. “I’d say that was good… but it didn’t have that deep-seated friction the last one had. Maybe if we amp up the thrusting power, we can improve that… the motors need finer tuning too. All in all… I’d give it an … eight and a half out of ten.” he replies. 

Jade laughs, “I had a feeling you’d say that. I’ve already got plans for the newer model for a motor, I think this one’s given its all. It’s from two updates ago so I think for us we’re going to have to get a bigger one.”

Dirk’s lips stretch into a wide smirk, “Then we’d best get to work, Miss Harley. Toys don’t make themselves.” 


End file.
